Today’s Quote

July 18, 2007

Garrison Keillor is good today:

A Norwegian hates to admit a mistake, however, so the emigrants wrote glowing letters back to Norway, which lured even more Norwegians to the Midwest, so they missed out on the great Norwegian oil and gas bonanza of the past 50 years. Our oil profits go to robber barons who give it to their wastrel children to subsidize lives of insane narcissism, but Norwegian oil profits go mostly to the Norwegian people and subsidize the little villages and the roads and rails needed to connect them — Norwegians are in favor of provincialism — and also go to the largest pension fund in Europe, $300 billion, which is forecast to more than double in the next 10 years.

American Norwegians live in little prairie towns where health care is the main industry because everybody’s old and their main asset is their home, which isn’t worth what it was because the town is shrinking because old people have a tendency to die. Their ancestors took a wrong turn. They had no idea America would fall into the hands of a failed oilman who would waste the country’s pension money on a war for oil while Norway, the world’s most peaceful country, enjoys a very sensible prosperity. They’ve voted twice to stay out of the European Union. Why mess with success?

The effrontery of those Norwegians! Managing their natural resources for the good of the country, instead of giving them away to political cronies!

It wouldn’t surprise me if William Kristol and FreaksNews started warning of the al-Qaeda influence in Oslo, and calling on the Bush administration to invade Norway.


One Response to “Today’s Quote”

  1. Ron Says:

    Too late to invade Norway, their oil fields are in decline. Its the one shining example of where oil wealth didn’t corrupt and destroy a society. Chalk it up to cultural standards hardened by weather patterns which meant that, if you didn’t take care of each other, you’d die.

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