Is It Still Good?
November 5, 2008
I halfway expected to wake up this morning and find out the Supreme Court had stepped in to overturn the results and hand the election to McCain. There would be Clarence Thomas on FoxNoise yelling, “Lawn jockey this, you Marxist motherfuckers!” But for the first time this century I woke up the day after a presidential election and found the world still made sense.
Say it with me, people: President Barack Obama. Whheeeeeeeee!
Obama’s acceptance speech was superb, naturally. There was a charming moment as the future First Lady and ther kids left the stage, swinging their arms a bit as they held hands. There they were in the world spotlight, acting like they owned the thing, and really they did. Obama and his people out-thought, out-fought, out-organized and just plain outclassed the Republicans and their squalling, loaded-diaper campaign.
In his concession speech, John McCain looked relieved. After all the time he spent soiling himself with the deranged nonsense he’d been required to mouth in his role as King of the Knuckleheads, McCain finally had a chance to talk like a grownup. In a way, he reminded me of Bob Dole, another smart guy with an appealingly sardonic sense of humor, who nevertheless had to sound like a grunting moron for several months in order to win his party’s support, and who looked like a big weight had been lifted from his shoulders when the better man took the prize.
Oh, but the crowd was not nearly so gracious as McCain. They reminded me of the manimals in The Island of Doctor Moreau, looking for somebody to drag off to the House of Pain. Sarah Palin barely connected with her erstwhile runing mate on the stage. No doubt she was plotting her future campaign, and I hope most fervently she makes it happen. These lemmings need to be led off the cliff a few more times, and if Caribou Barbie wants the job, I say let her have it. The prize will be her punishment, and it couldn’t happen to a nicer creep.